Jin had a friend over today.
It freaked him out that I found out, I think he lost track of time. It was some lady with red hair, and in a vest. He was in his human form at least, which was good, but they seemed to know each other.
He yelled at her to go, f-bombs and everything. She didn’t shy away from replying in the same way. They didn’t seem to like each other at all.
His mood throughout the rest of the night was way worse than usual, I think it was his way to keep me from asking him about her.
Strange thing is, avoidance isn’t really his thing. So it’s weird.
He’s been very direct about not answering my questions in the past. Which means, maybe… it’s a topic that really hurts. Something he doesn’t want to lie about, or even hide? So it’s easier if I don’t ask.
I don’t ask about my parents anymore, but I used to. I used to ask why I was what I was, and why he is what he is, and what the world is like really. Like I said, he’s direct, he just says he can’t tell me.
That’s all. “Can’t say.”
The reason only comes out when he’s too drunk to hide it. And even then, it’s just vague.
“They’ll kill me.”
I’ve interpreted this in two ways.
One, there’s information in what he would tell me that, if divulged, would lead “them” to us. As in we’re actually being hunted and I don’t know about it.
Two, he’s taking care of me under threat of life.
The second doesn’t make much sense to me, I honestly don’t feel that he hates me. The first one doesn’t make much sense either, why would telling me what I am lead to us getting found out? And if we’re being hunted, wouldn’t we be moving around all the time?
Anyways, yeah, he doesn’t hate me. I think he does like… loathe the sight of me, because of whatever past tragedy spawned me. Something really bad went down and I was born as a consequence, I think that’s it.
It’s just that his actions don’t really corroborate with this hateful attitude that he has, especially when drunk.
I should write them down sometime, the signs that let me know he doesn’t hate me. If only to remember that, despite his troubles, and his problems, Jin’s my father.
These are journal entries from the protagonist of the comic book Aegis Omega. If you’re not familiar with the story, I invite you to change that and read up on it:
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